Two Incredible Jobs

My school year is quickly coming to an end and the stress of taking down my classroom, getting report cards done, and wrapping it up with my students makes for a stressful time of year. Knowing that I had so much to do, Rob brought the kids down to my class so he could help out. Rob worked on taking butcher paper down, while Ry and Jake watched TV, Luke just ran a muck and destroyed my class :)! Sitting there I was overcome by how truly blessed I am. Our life is not easy and at times can be beyond overwhelming, but knowing Rob has my back gives overwhelming comfort. It was after 6 when he got there and worked until after 7 to get it all done. I loved having my kids there with me, getting to share my home away from home with them and having them be a part of the job I love most after being their mom.

I would give anything to be a stay at home mom and get to be there for my own kids. Many days I feel like I let them down, because I get pulled in so many different directions and they need so much more than I can give. But just having them in my classroom, feels so right. Knowing that they are part of me and make me who I am. They make me a better teacher and are in my thoughts every second I am dealing with my students. I love them all so much and often wonder how I got to be so lucky! Being their mom is an amazing blessing, getting to teach and be their mom is beyond words!

Been Awhile

It has been a REALLY long time since I have even bothered opening up my blog. To say life has been insane would be an understatement. Turns out TSC never takes a vacation and as the kids get older the trials are magnified. Thankfully, Ry is still mild and her seizures remain controlled with medication. In just 3 short weeks she will be promoted from the 6th grade and officially be a junior higher.  Jake is a 3rd grader in a 4-6 mild to severe SDC class (because of his size). Behavior remains difficult and everyday is a balancing act of seeing his sweet, lovable personality, and flipping the switch that causes him to flip out uncontrollably with no possible reasoning skills to bring him back. Luke is averaging 5-10 seizures a day, which remains the most controlled his seizures have been since he was 3 months old. Now that he is physically doing better, behavior has begun to interfere is his day-to-day functioning. Being on so many seizure medications, it is difficult to add something else for behavior. Next week we will begin the Modified Atkins, in hope that it will help control some of the seizures and allow us to wean him off some of his seizure medications.

We never know what the day will bring or what obstacles we will have to overcome. We also never know what milestone one of the kids will reach or  the what small accomplishment we will be able to rejoice in. TSC is a constant rollercoaster of feeling complete defeat and knowing that you are undefeatable. There are no words that can adequately describe what those of us that live with TSC daily go through.

This is the video I made to fundraise for the TSC walk, and is a short version of our story.

 

So, I am going to once again begin my blogging, if for no other reason than expressing this unfathomable thing called life.  I have always loved to write and as the TSC community is continuously revealing their strength and support to me, I thought, why not document our day-to-day trials and victories again. I am hoping that this will be therapeutic for me as well as remind me that there will be good and there will be bad days. The key is stepping back and seeing how God brings you through the days you feel you can take no more, learn from the errors and see how with each turn in the road we become stronger, have more of a voice and can make a greater impact in our kids' lives, those around us and the TSC community as a whole.