June 29

( Sue and Eddie Moore at Spaghetti Factory)
(Reese, Bailey, Ry and Hannah before VBS)

Today was my first official day of summer break and I was so happy to be home. Ry had her first day of VBS and she was so excited. Staci is her teacher this year and Hannah is in her class, so it is an extra special day. Since Staci had to go to church early, she dropped Hannah off at our house. Then Lisa came over with Bailey and Reese, so we started the day with a picture in our front yard. Jake did not do VBS this year because it is too overwhelming for him. Instead he is going to summer school with Riverside Unified.

The rest of the day was spent running around and getting ready for Iowa. Then we met my parents, Staci and Hannah, and Sue and Eddie at Spaghetti Factory for dinner. Now going out to eat with the three kids is always a little scary. Add Luke having a bad seizure morning and Jake with no nap and it is pretty much a nightmare. Jake was in his usual meltdown mode calling Rob and I 'idiots" whenever we asked him something. Where he got "idiots" or why it has become his favorite word I do do not. Thankfully Staci and my mom are good at intervening so Rob and I don't loose it. Having children with special needs is difficult and figuring out how to control behavior is a daunting task. I love my boy so much and he is one of the sweetest kids you will ever meet. But when he is in meltdown mode, there is no listening or behaving. We are trying so hard, but it is frustrating, especially in public with friends you do not see often. We did make it through the meal without any major episodes, which is a miracle in itself. I know that God is watching over Jake and us, but man it is hard sometimes.

June 28

Today was a fun-filled, sunny kind of day. Our neighbors that moved to Mississippi years ago came to visit and have been staying with my parents. We all headed to my parents for a day of swimming. The kids love the pool and they had a lot of fun having a new audience. Jake has become so brave lately and we even practiced swimming without the floaties. Jumping off the waterfall has become a favorite pastime, which my heart still skips a beat everytime. It was a really fun day!

June 27

(Elizabeth, Holly, Me, Kirsten, Davonne, and Gracie

(Faye was not there))

Still trying to fight off this cold, so I took it easy today. Rob went golfing, so I got to hang out with the kids. As tiring as my kids can be, I love the chance to relax at home with them. Ry has been such a great big sis lately and Jake and Luke love to play. When Rob got home from golf, he took the kids to my parents to swim while I got ready for my school party.

The party was at my Principal's house and was a lot of fun. As I have said before, we are losing a lot of great teachers and this was a last chance for us all to get together. All of the first grade team was at the party except, one. On the first grade team we are losing 2 teachers and a third is switching grades. It has been a great year and my first grade team has been so supportive. When I left Preston I worried about how the people around me would deal with me and my personal life. Putting my own kids first causes me to miss a lot of school and rely on my team members to pick up my slack. I can say that this team stepped right up and made it so I could concentrate on Ry, Jake and Luke without having to worry about my students. Next year will be so different, but as always I have to trust God's plan. I am grateful for such a great year!

June 26

( Luke with his new injury, doesn't he look upset???)
(Getting ready for Bill Engvall)
(We were only three rows back!)

My last day of school and it was a crazy one. The morning started off with Ry and Luke playing on the bed, Luke standing up, falling and hitting his head on the nightstand. After getting the crying and bleeding to stop, it was determined that he needed to go to the doctor. So I took Ry to school with me, Rob took Jake to school and then Luke to the doctor. Luckily be just needed that bandage glue to hold the cut together.

Then I finished out my last day with only 10 students in attendance. It is so frustrating how many days my students miss, but made for a quiet day that allowed me to get alot done.

After work Rob and I got to go out. We went to see the comedian, Bill Engvall, in San Bernardino. It was a great show and we laughed and laughed. Unfortunately we came home to both boys being up, but still a GREAT time. Now I am simply exhausted. It was a good year, but I am excited to spend some time with the family.

June 25

Today was my pizza party for my students and I asked Rob if him and Ry wanted to come. Since Rob had to take Jake to school and wait for his mom to watch Luke, I took Ry to work with me in the morning. It was so fun having her there and the kids were so excited. I was amazed at how tall and old she looked next to my students. It seems like yesterday that she was so small. It was a good day.

June 24

As the school year comes to an end I am filled with mixed emotions. This school year has been tough and these kids are rough. For some, school is the only stability they have in their life, and watching their growth despite the obstacles is inspiring. Also watching some of the teachers at work in the school is inspiring. As the state continues to be in financial crisis, I feel the kids are suffering the most. Class sizes are going up and we are losing many valuable, irreplaceable teachers. On my first grade team we are losing two incredible teachers that have worked wonders in their classrooms. The first grade team took these teachers to dinner after school, so we could hang out before our final day.

Sometimes I wonder how it could have gotten so bad, In a world that is so uncertain, education should be a solid force. Yet, the future of our children is so fragile. I know that God has a plan, even now. but watching my students and peers struggles makes it one of those times, I wish we could skip ahead to the outcome and not have to live through the frustration. I know that is not how God works, yet it would be nice, sometimes.

June 23

This morning when I was getting ready, Rob and the kids were all downstairs. Rob came up and left the three kids alone, which is usually a no, no. The result is almost always Ry and Luke crying and Jake in top of one of them. Me being the paranoid mom ran downstairs to prevent any unforeseen disaster. Instead of chaos I was greeted by an unusual sight. Ry was sitting in the chair holding Luke, laughing and Jake was sitting by himself smiling at them. Apparently Luke was giving Ry some of his lovely, wet kisses and Ry was tickling him and laughing. Jake, wanting to be included was sitting back laughing at both of them. It was one of those memories that will be etched in my mind forever. All three of my kids smiling and laughing, taking care of eachother. Ry was the leader, but Jake and Luke were right there with her. Suddenly, I realized that no matter what happens in this life, those three will always be there for eachother. At that moment I was so full of pride for my three kids and Rob. He had the foresight to trust and let go way before me.

June 22

Today was a long day at work and I was ready to get home and collapse. After eating dinner and finally sitting down for five minutes I heard Rob, say, "huh, Shannon?" I turned around and there was Luke sitting in the middle of the table trying to color. He has gotten so quick at climbing and getting whatever he wants. You just gotta laugh!

June 21 Father's Day

(Coffee Bean and Tea, notice Luke sitting like a big boy)
( Rock Collection that Ry painted Rob for Father's Day)

(The kids with their Papa)

Today was a gret day celebrating Rob. We started off by going to Coffee Bean and Tea for breakfast then there was a Target run for medicine. By that time the kids had hit their limit and it was home for a nap. Then we went over to my parents' house to celebrate with my dad. It was a really busy but good day.

Mostly, I appreciate the chance to recognize two extraordinary men. My dad has not had an easy life, yet he is one of the kindest, strongest men you will ever meet. These last few year have had trauma, yet he has used his faith to not only get himself through, but the rest of us as well. The kids adore their papa and I am so grateful for his support and love.

Then there is Rob. What can I say that most don't already know. He is the most incredible father and husband. These last few years have been extremely trying for us. Dealing with the medical issues and then the lay off have tested us. Rob has stood strong and had faith, which has helped us grow closer to God and eachother. Any dad that stays at home and takes care of the kids is pretty amazing. Make those three kids "special needs," and he is extraordinary. I can not say enough how grateful I am that God allowed Rob to be my husband and father to out three amazing kids.

June 20

Today I went shopping with my mom. sis and Ry. It was another one of those rare occasions that the girls get to hang out together. We started off at Gottchalks, went to California Pizza Kitchen, had yogurt and ended up and Bed, Bath and Beyond. My mom is still struggling with pain in her back so it was an extremely busy day and Ry and I were both exhausted when we got home. Ry's big purchase of the day was a new hat. We decided that she can definitely be a hat person and enjoyed her excitement in wearing it. It really is the little things that make life so special. I am excited for Father's Day tomorrow and celebrating the two most incredible dads in the world, Rob and my dad!

June 19

Happy to report it is Friday and I get to hang out with the family this weekend. While I was at work today, Rob got to go to the Wylie Center for a family picnic and Jake's last day. The Wylie center was our saving grace when we did not know where Jake should go to school or where he would fit in. It is a special needs daycare/preschool that Jake has loved. Mostly, all the teachers have loved Jake and his big hugs and smiles. Today was his last day since he will be going to summer school with Riverside Unified and then beginning Kindergarten. Chances are Luke will some day attend the school, and as a parent with children with special needs I am grateful for the school and teachers that have the gift and patience to work with these children.

June 18

Today I had to rush home to hang out with my boys while Rob got to golf and Ry hung out with Grammy. I was home by 3:45 and it was soooooo nice! I can't remember the last time I got home before 6, lately. I had a good time hanging out with my boys and was cracking up at all the mischief they get into. Luke really loves causing trouble and when Ry got home he had a blast putting her shoes on his hands. He had us all laughing so hard. Not bad for a severely delayed 2 1/2 year old with uncontrolled seizures. Have I mentioned that he has had under 5 seizures in the last 3 days? :-) Whether the pattern holds or not is in God's hands, but I am enjoying it while it lasts!

If you think of it thank God for us and pray that this is the path God has planned for my boy. Prayer is powerful and prayer of thanksgiving is peace.

June 17

The end of the school year is quickly approaching and work is CRAZY!!! Today we did a first grade performance for the parents. It was so nice having all 7 first grade classes participate and to see the parent turn out. I was pretty proud of our students and staff. It was fun, but I am glad it is over :-).

June 16

My mom decided to let Ry come over and hang out with her today. It sounds like they had a great day together. The cherry on top was when I went to pick Ry up my parents had ordered Olive Garden to go for all of us for dinner. Luke's new trick is trying to eat with a fork. Needless to say, spaghetti was everywhere, but overall, he did pretty good.

June 15

I have brought my report cards home the last week in an effort to get ahead and get them done. This is why they are still sitting on the counter untouched, so much for getting ahead.

June 14

After church and naps we headed to Grammy and Papa's house to barbecue hot dogs. Staci and Hannah were there and they did their softball homework. It was nice to see my mom feeling a little better and get to enjoy having the kids over. Jake, Luke and I watched as Hannah and Ry worked on their form. Still not sure about this whole softball thing :-).

June 13

Today was a lazy day of hanging around the house doing nothing. Rob did take Ry and go to the Angel game with Staci and Hannah, so I took the boys to my parents for awhile. It was just nice to sit outside and relax, and yes I did read some. I love how excited the boys get to see my parents. Jake has always been excited, but it is nice to see Luke's eyes light up with excitement and hear squeals of joy when Grammy and Papa come near. Notice Jake has his firetrucks that he takes everywhere. It was a relaxing evening that ended with both boys ready for bed when we got home.

June 12

What a crazy, amazing day?!? It began with Jake's preschool graduation. He has done so incredible at Sunshine this year and I am so unbelievably proud of him! Being a part of the Sunshine graduation was so much fun because there were so many kids with different special needs that graduated. The theme was "Sail Away to Kindergarten," and I am so excited for my boy. He has so many obstacles in his way, but that sweet smile says it all. I am really grateful to Sunshine and how they worked with Jake this year. Rob and I got him a new fire truck for a graduation present and he could not have been happier. It was a really good morning. Then it was off to pick up Ry and begin her gift for a great year.

Rob and I picked up Ry and took her to Disneyland, while Jake stayed with the Grandias and Luke stayed with my parents. Ry has worked so hard this year we wanted to reward her. It turned out our friend Cristy was also going to Disneyland with her three girls that day so we met up. Ry had so much fun having Rob and I too herself and then having friends there was an added bonus. Rob and I enjoyed the ease of Dineyland with one kid and no stroller :-). It was a really great afternoon and perfect end to a great day!

June 11

Tomorrow is Ry's last day of 2nd grade and Jake's last day of preschool. I can not believe how grown up they are becoming. Jake was so excited to ride the bus this year and LOVES the bus driver, Sam. I took a picture this morning when Jake got on the bus, such fun memories!

June 10

I was back at work today and Rob took Luke and went to our nephew, John's, 6th grade graduation. John was born when Rob and I were still dating right out of high school. Since his mom was young they lived at home with the Grandia's and Rob quickly learned some parenting skills. It has been so much fun watching John grow up over the years into a sweet and thoughtful young man. Rob adores his nephew, but unfortunately we do not get to see him that often. John is so good with my three "trouble makers," and just fun to be around. I was sorry I missed the graduation but glad Rob got to be there.

June 9

Today I went with Rob and Ry to Rylee's second grade class picnic. It was so much fun to watch her interact with her peers and see how grown up she has become. I am sooooooo extremely proud of her. It was also a really good day just hanging out with my hubby. Once agin, I can not say enough the difference a good teacher makes in the life of a child. God has really been looking out for Ry!

June 8

Back to work and appreciating a little help from my hubby. Rob came down and helped me get more "stuff" done in the classroom. Mostly he spent a bunch of time laminating. It must be hard being married to a teacher.

June 7

Today was a much needed relaxing day at home. We went over to my parents for a little while after afternoon naps, by Ry and Jake, but other than that we just hung out. Unfortunately, I also got zero housework done, but read a couple hundred pages in my latest Harry Potter book. Mostly, I appreciated my hubby and kids.

Our friend from high school had a new baby girl on Friday and we found out yesterday that she is in the ICU at Loma Linda. Although, Luke's condition was never touch and go I remember those days in the ICU wondering was my baby going to be okay. My heart breaks for them and what they are dealing with and the faith, they have to have. All our kids are such miracles, but watching Luke get into trouble, laughing and walking today was almost serene. How far we have come? I was thinking about Luke's first Christmas and how he was at the hospital while we celebrated with Ry and Jake. I can still feel the sadness and despair I felt leaving him. It is nice to be in the spot to look back at the miracle rather than praying for it. Rob and I have not stopped praying for our friends since the text yesterday and hope and pray that they too will have that moment of reflection and realizing the miracle God has worked.

I promise to add my pictures tomorrow.

June 6

Okay done with my pity party and back to real life :-). Today was filled with taking Jake to the dentist. Ry went with Rob's parent's to see John and Jordan and Luke hung out with my parents. Despite being a dentist appointment it was nice to have Rob and me with Jake by himself. The dentist was amazing with Jake, and he was such a trooper. During the exam and x-rays he just kept saying "this is fun mommy!" He was so picking cute. Then the teeth pulling began. Turns out Jake needed 3 teeth pulled and 4 cavities, not great news. The dentist wanted to get two of the teeth pulled today since they kept getting infected. So we attempted "laughing gas" and holding him down. The smiles soon left and the screaming began. It was not fun, but the dentist did it. For the next tooth pulling and fills we will be putting my poor boy under. I was really proud of what a trooper he was. Jake is so very special. Also, I loved watching Rob with him, such an amazing dad. It was a good day, a good day of being with my family (dentist and all).

June 5 "Pity Party"

Okay, so I got behind a whole week. Life has been overwhelming me lately and I have gotten behind again. Luke's seizures have been bad again. We had to use the diastat to try and stop the seizures three times in the last week. Then, suddenly an explanation arose, Luke was sick. He spiked a fever and breathing has been bad for the last five days. This at least explains the rotten seizures lately, but now Rob and I are on around the clock watch for fevers and breathing.

Then there is work. There is always a lot to do at the end of the year: assessments, report cards, getting ready for next year, and teaching as much as possible in the last few weeks. My class this year has been one of my roughest ever. I here "I don't care!" all day long. Plus the fighting and the tattling is out of control. Lately I have been at a loss because I don't know how to reach these kids. They are so needy and have such difficult lives. Sometimes I don't feel I have enough in me to give to my students and my home life.

An example is this, I had a long day of students throwing attitudes in class, fighting and refusing to complete assignments. I finally left work at 4:30 because I needed to pick Jake up at 5:00. I got to Jake's school at about 5:15 and they were just getting ready to watch Toy Story, this is Jake's favorite. I was greeted by a happy boy pointing to the TV. When I told him we needed to go he walked out without a problem, which surprised me. As soon as I put him in the car and tried to buckle him the tantrum began. He wanted Woody and Buzz. Jake screamed bloody murder the whole way home kicking my seat and trying to hit me. We finally got home and Ry started whining that she was hungry, and Luke was crying because Jake barreled into the room and pushed him down. The hard part is that this is a typical day lately.

I know I am tired, therefore feeling extra glum right now, and I apologize. I LOVE teaching. My hope is that some of this work is making an impact. And I LOVE my children. Sometimes I wander if I am always doing what is best for them or being patient enough with them. I feel like my children are never going to have it easy. Ry quit dance on Monday because her dance teacher yelled at her so much she was in tears and scared to dance. I know that she struggles and how frustrating it can be, but how can I protect her? How do I protect them?

Then there is Rob who is the most incredible husband ever, but it is hard. Having him out of work is great for the kids, but it is hard. He is doing my job at home and I miss it, but am working so much I have no energy to do it when I get home. I know that we are supposed to trust the Lord and not stress about the future, but that has been so difficult. What does the future hold for our finances and Rob's job? We our so lucky to have family support during these difficult financial times, but the uncertainity of our future can be so overwhelming sometimes. Even now Rob is downstairs fighting to get Luke to sleep and giving him another breathing treatment. Rob is so amazing and deserves the peace of mind.

I promise tomorrow I will get back to the daily going on and be out of my slump. In no way do I regret my life, I lOVE my life. But, my life, like so many others, is difficult and it feels good to say "poor me" for a few minutes. Then I get over it and do my best to follow this crazy plan God has for my life. I can honestly say that I have never blamed God or been mad at God for the way my life is evolving. Rather I have had sadness. Sadness for the stress and strain, for the decisions we have to make for the kids, to survive a Jake outburst and know that he is so unhappy, to watch Ry give up something she loves because of the ignorance and lack of patience of someone she trusted, sadness for my students that have had to grow up way too fast and live through more that I could only imagine, and sadness for Luke who's little body convulses, yet he fights the seizure with a smile.

I have my "pity parties" like everyone else, but at the end of the day I know how incredibly blessed I am. I have my kids, my hubby, my job and my family. God really does know what He is doing, the goal is to stay the path. I pray daily for the wisdom patience to take care of my children and my students and the strength to "stay the course."