Trusting the Unknown (Work Post)

The unknown, is it scary or hopeful?

Five years ago, I made the decision to leave my school sight of the past six years and move to a brand new school, team and principal I didn't know.  I wasn't really happy where I was at, but my currant principal new about my situation with my kids and pretty much left me alone.  I was comfortable and wasn't really looking for a change.  Then I got bumped and was told I had to move.  The next couple weeks I put in transfer requests and interviewed at couple sites in the district.  The day I interviewed for the brand new school, Werner Elementary, and was offered first grade, I also found out I got my spot back where I was at.  I was so torn and the fear of the unknown almost kept me where I was.  My currant principal wanted to change my grade and refused to let me stay in first, so that was my deciding factor to leave.  I thank God daily, he insisted on moving me or I would never have stepped into that unknown.

Opening a new school is an unique experience that few teachers get the privilege of doing.  The school administration, expectations, students, peers and culture is all unknown.  You have teachers from different sites, different areas of expertise, and a fresh perspective.  I should also add that I was fortunate to have another teacher from my site (that was also my good friend), move as well.  The added perk was that she was assigned first grade too, so we were on the same team.  I had some familiarity and support to go along with my unknown.  We had to come together and follow the principal's vision that we were all "stars."  The Werner Stars were born and the mindset that all our students would succeed in life was mandatory.  We have worked hard as a school site to help our students realize how truly special they are and as I saw my first year first graders promote this year, I am so proud of what has been accomplished.

Making that jump was one of the best decisions of my life.  My principal has been beyond supportive.  Not only has she understood and supported me through some of the most difficult times with the kids health, but she has shown me respect, appreciation, and value for what I do.  My first grade team over the last 5 years has had some changes, but every year I have been privileged to teach with an amazing group of teachers.  To put into words how these woman have helped me is impossible.  They have shown me how to become a better teacher, prayed with me, cried with me and rejoiced with me.  They have become much more than peers, but they have become my friends and a part of my extended family.  This last year I had six teachers from Werner walk in the TSC walk-a-thon as well as donations by my principal, the school as a whole, custodians, librarian, and other teachers.  The support is humbling and to think if I had never gone into the unknown, I never would have known these incredible people that God brought into mine and my family's life.

As another school year has come to an end, I am again faced with an unknown. Two of my first grade team (including my good friend since the beginning), are on temporary contracts and still waiting to find out of they have jobs, let alone still be at Werner next year.  Then our principal just announced that she will be getting a promotion and a new principal is coming in.  This has caused me to step back and reflect on what the unknown really is.

You see living with Tuberous Sclerosis, everyday is the unknown.  I am constantly searching for security and assurance that all will be okay.  As changes happen, the not knowing what comes next, can be almost paralyzing.  If I had not stepped into that unknown 5 years ago, my life would be drastically different.  As my peers and I step into another unknown for the 2013-2014 school year, I am forced to once again have faith.  Faith that this is where I need to be and surrounded by the people I need to be surrounded by.  But, I also need to acknowledge and say "thank you!"  Thank you to Ms McIver for taking me as part of her staff 5 years ago, allowing me the experience of helping open up a school, the freedom to take care of my own kids, the support I needed in the classroom and in my own personal life, and the validation I needed to know that I could be a teacher and a mom!  Thank you to my first grade team, who have prayed with me everyday, cried with me when I was in my lowest moments, encouraged me when I was frustrated, and always had my back no matter what obstacle I faced at school or at home.

The unknown, scary? YES but, so HOPEFUL.  There is something so encouraging about knowing that the unknown can take you down incredible roads and help create a better you.